


Kiss me as you raise me to the stars

by zombie593



Category: Downton Abbey
Genre: First Time, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Male Slash
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-30
Updated: 2015-03-30
Packaged: 2018-03-20 11:27:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3648591
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/zombie593/pseuds/zombie593
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thomas and Jimmy had been together for quite some time now, but they hadn't had sex yet, meaning it all came down to kisses in the evenings and meaningful stares across the table in the servants’ hall. Jimmy's about to change that.<br/>Pretty much your average silly one-shot.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kiss me as you raise me to the stars

**Author's Note:**

> A huge Thommy fan here! I'm publishing here for the first time, although I read a lot on ao3.   
> So I had this idea and I wrote it pretty quickly last night. I really really hope the smut isn't too poorly-written. I'd appreciate it if you review this, I need to know what you liked and whether you have any recommendations. Thanks! c:

Jimmy was anxious. These days, wind seemed to find its way every night into his room despite the closed door and window, and he couldn’t sleep. He didn’t know if it was the coldness’ doing or it was just him. Overthinking and panicking over problems he felt he was imagining. It still scared him, though. Just like a little child scared of the shadows of trees’ branches on particularly stormy night.

 

He was not even sure what he was feeling anxious about, but he still did. Every morning he stood in front of the mirror in his room, fixing his livery and his hair to make himself look presentable, and frowning at his reflection. And it was not that he found himself revolting, he knew he had the looks and the confirmation for that were all the maids sending him coy playful smiles when he passed them in the corridors or went to the kitchen to steal something from Mrs. Patmore, earning himself a scolding or a slap across the hand.

 

He knew it was not that.

 

It was Thomas.

 

They’d been together for a couple of months now, as _together_ as they could be in a society like that. They’d chat and laugh and smoke a fag around the others, and when they were together, free to be themselves, they kissed and touched and cuddled and talked like they wouldn’t ever be able to in front of people.

 

But it was all so very formal. There was this barrier around them just when they seemingly got lost in the moment, and they never got too carried away. They never did, well, physical things. Of course there were the touches and kisses, but nothing beyond that.

 

This was bugging Jimmy greatly.

 

Usually this was not something he’d concern himself with, but he felt self-conscious these days. Even if he didn’t look so bad, Thomas was so many levels above him. He seemed so simply gorgeous, so naturally and effortlessly handsome. Jimmy’s head spun when he walked into the room. The only thing Jimmy could think of was that they never got any further in their relationship because, consciously or not, Thomas didn’t find him as attractive as Jimmy found Thomas.

 

Despite telling him he loved him, well, why hadn’t Thomas already made love to Jimmy?

 

The self-consciousness that troubled Jimmy these days reflected on his certainty in the abilities he had or didn't have in bed. Truth be told, Jimmy had never lain with a man before. A couple of women, yes, and all of them seemed perfectly happy, but Thomas was so much. And he deserved so much more.

 

He was suddenly so unsure of himself, it was frightening.

 

 --

 

“Hey, love”, Thomas said quietly, smiling as he met Jimmy in the corridor of the men’s quarters, brushing with his fingertips Jimmy’s forearm. Jimmy smiled fondly at him in return.

 

“Hello. Shall we go?”

 

They pretty much have turned waiting for the other in the corridor into a little habit, so they could have the opportunity to be themselves for a minute before the day started.

 

At least that gave Jimmy strength not to push Thomas against a wall in front of everybody and kiss him until he needed oxygen too much.

 

The morning was usual, quite busy, but uneventful nonetheless. Jimmy had managed to control his self-consciousness for now and he just felt relieved when Thomas almost tangled feet with his under the table, their knees touching as they ate and drank their tea, the rest of the staff conversing lightly. Jimmy allowed himself to smile a bit while taking a bite of toast. He had lost himself into the pleasant sensation of Thomas being right there beside him and when he heard a bit of a conversation Mr. Carson was having with Mrs. Hughes about _inappropriate behaviour in the house_ , he coughed in his cup and almost spat his tea.

 

Anna looked over at him with concern, asking if he was okay and Mr. Moleslay glanced in his direction with confusion. Thomas couldn’t help but laugh in his own cup of tea at his partner’s sudden reaction, explaining “Those _house maids_ are apparently causing some trouble.”

 

He watched as Jimmy processed the information for a second and then smiled conspiratorially “Yes, those _maids_. Completely intolerable.”

 

After that, not much happened, Jimmy followed Mr. Carson’s orders and he rarely saw Thomas for longer than a few seconds. By the time it got dark, and dinner was served, he was longing to be with the under butler, to kiss his lips, to listen to his sarcastic remarks about something that happened around the house during the day, to breathe in his familiar aftershave and just generally be with him. In his own mind, he wasn’t asking for much.

 

The end of dinner couldn’t come soon enough, if you asked Jimmy Kent. But eventually it did, and he rushed to get downstairs, and then out of the door where he found Thomas, precise in his _evening-smoke_ _routine_ as a clock, head tilted against the wall, smoke curling up, creating wondrous figures in the cold evening air. That way, he looked more relaxed than ever with his eyes closed and his posture not so stiff as usual, raven hair smoothed back but a few strands falling around his beautiful face. Jimmy felt his stomach do things at the sight of Thomas, and his heart was apparently affected too as it danced in his chest.

 

Jimmy didn’t even want to disturb Thomas and considered the idea of leaving quietly, but just then Thomas opened his eyes and tilted his head in Jimmy’s direction.

 

“Jimmy”, he smiled sincerely and Jimmy loved to be the reason for that easy smile. It was heartwarming.

 

“Guess who was discussing over dinner if they should invite a new potential husband over at the abbey”, Jimmy laughed as he slumped against the wall, pressing right next to Thomas and pulling a cigarette off the offered pack in the man’s hand.

 

“It couldn’t have possibly been Lady Mary, now, could it?”, Thomas mocked, smilingly wittily.

 

“Not ever”, Jimmy laughed. “I missed you today”, Jimmy looked down at his feet, a blush definitely appearing on his cheeks.

 

“Then we should probably go to, our _respective_ rooms, of course”, Thomas mockingly said as he inhaled smoke and then turned sideways to exhale.

 

“We _most definitely_ should”, Jimmy shared Thomas’s smirk. For a minute they stayed outside, finishing their cigarettes with Jimmy resting his head on Thomas’ shoulder and Thomas’ hand holding him around his waist, both of them conversationally discussing their days. When they finished, they threw the fag butts away and headed to Thomas’ room.

 

They had this habit of always going to Thomas’ room instead of Jimmy’s without talking about it, it was just that the last time they were both there Jimmy had not yet accepted his feelings for Thomas and had so many restrictions when it came to who he was that it had gone very bad. So they, as an unspoken rule didn’t go there as it brought memories neither of them wished to remember.

 

Both of them looked around before they entered together, just in case somebody saw them, luckily there was no one around, and locked the door behind them.

 

“I’ve waited for this all day”, Jimmy said as he grabbed Thomas’ face in both of his hands, jaw sharp beneath his fingers, and kissed him with all his being. If he could, he would’ve kissed him until the end of time.

 

“Mm”, Thomas moaned as he wrapped his hands around Jimmy’s waist, bringing him close to his body.

 

“Can’t we stay like this forever?”, Jimmy asked rhetorically with a sigh as he left Thomas’ lips and instead rested their foreheads together. Thomas cupped Jimmy’s face with one hand, his other one going in his blond hair.

 

“I wish we could”, Thomas kissed him this time, tender but passionate and it was better than any other kiss Jimmy’s had. But Thomas wasn’t going to go beyond kissing him. Jimmy was pretty sure. They kissed more while touching each other’s arms, hands, hair, face, chest, stomach, but Thomas never seemed to be interested in Jimmy in the sexual way, never overstepping some invisible for Jimmy boundary that bugged him endlessly.

 

“Thomas, I-…I have a question”, Jimmy said, panting a little.

 

“I am listening then”, Thomas stepped back a bit, a sign he was really listening, apparently.

 

“Well, I don’t want to make a fool out of myself but it is bothering me, a lot, and I-“

  
Thomas was about to say something when Jimmy was already blurting out “-why don’t you touch me?”

 

Thomas looked quite taken aback. He raised his eyebrows, laughed, then frowned a bit “What do you mean, Jimmy, I was touching you until a second ago...”

 

Now Jimmy felt like a fool. But he didn’t want to phrase himself in such a way that it would sound vulgar and cheap. He really wanted it to be special with Thomas. He longed to be with him in an intimate, sensual way, to know his body as well as his own and just be with him fully. He just couldn’t understand why Thomas couldn’t see what he was seeing. Did he really love him? Did he find him…

 

“Do you find me appealing?”, it seems that the only way Jimmy was able to talk about the matter was blurting things he didn’t have enough time to think about.

 

“Well, why would I be with you if I didn’t?”

 

Jimmy breathed out with frustration evident in his body language and on his face “For a clever sort you understand awfully slowly.”, Jimmy actually expected a comeback but such never came. Jimmy was bringing them close to fighting and somewhere in the back of his mind he screamed to himself to just drop it, but no, Jimmy Kent was the most stubborn person and he wanted to know right now. He was done with feeling insecure about himself and unsure of Thomas loving him.

 

The man was waiting for an explanation apparently so Jimmy said in a quieter voice “You’re never. With me, entirely”, he tried to explain.

 

That’s when something in Thomas’ almost transparent eyes changed and he came closer to the boy.

 

“Is this really bothering you?”, he cupped the blonde’s face with both of his hands and kissed him deeply “Why would it?”

 

“Well because- because I feel I’m not enough for you. You’ve been with men before and would have expectations. Not to mention you’re gorgeous. Why would you-“

 

“Do you really think that? You’re more than I ever dreamed for, Jimmy, and I love that I get to be with you. If anything, I should be thinking I’m not enough for _you_ ”, Thomas pulled him as close as possible, putting a lot into their kiss.

 

When they broke off, Jimmy sighed “Then, if you love me, why haven’t we slept together?”, he rested his forehead against Thomas’.

 

“I don’t want to rush you into anything, love, it’s as simple as that”, Thomas murmured and smiled, caressing his arms “Of course I want to, but I’m not going to initiate it until you’re ready.”

 

Jimmy suddenly felt his heart leaping wildly in his chest. Did Thomas really do it because of him? But Jimmy was so sure, he was not giving him more reasons to delay what both of them wanted.

 

“Thomas Barrow, I want you. I want you right now.”

 

“Are you sure, Jimmy, I don’t want you to-“

 

“Yes, of course I’m sure, please just-“, Jimmy crashed his lips against Thomas and slid his tongue inside the man’s gorgeous mouth. “Show me you love me”

 

Thomas responded quickly enough, sliding his fingers through the other’s hair and pulling passionately. Thomas moaned deep in his throat and it sent sensations directly to Jimmy’s lower parts. This was good, yes. _So far, so good_ , thought Jimmy.

 

He was the one to push them further where the small bed was and not breaking the points where they connected, he put Thomas down on the bed and lay on top of him, kissing him and freeing him of his livery, leaving him to deal with the buttons of his white shirt himself while Jimmy pulled at his raven, already quite messy hair, kissing his mouth, jaw, chest. He had a nice chest, but of course he would.

 

When Thomas struggled out of his shirt, he rolled them over and pinned Jimmy down. God, yes. This was even better.

 

Thomas was tantalizingly slowly removing the garments of Jimmy’s uniform, probably unintentionally brushing his crotch area with his own. Oh, yes.

 

“Mm, keep doing that, it is good”, Jimmy could feel himself blushing. Thomas smirked at him.

  
“Oh, you mean like that? It feels good?”, he pressed his hips against Jimmy’s and grinded them together, Jimmy unconsciously pushing forward to create friction between them. He was already hard, and he could feel Thomas’ hardness through both their pants.

 

“Yes, yes, so good, we should get these off, hmm?”, Jimmy managed to say between ragged breaths as Thomas invaded his mouth with his tongue, then trailed a path of feathery kisses down to his throat and then sucking a little above his collarbone. While Thomas kept kissing him everywhere, they tried getting their pants off, but it was too slow and Jimmy was too hard.

 

He scratched Thomas’ back with his nails and then both of his hands traveled to the back of Thomas’ neck, trailing into his hair and pulling down, kissing him, rubbing against him.

 

“You’re completely, ah, you’re sure, right, Jimmy?”, Thomas was trying to be quiet with his moans while Jimmy was on the border of going crazy so he couldn’t contain himself as well as the other man.

 

“I want you, Thomas, I want you so much. Please, just- ah”, Jimmy was grabbing at whatever part of Thomas he could get a hold of. “Take me, make me yours, be with me”, he moaned.

 

“I love you, Jimmy”, Thomas pushed his hips against the boy’s, sweet sensations overpowering everything.

 

“Show me how much you love me, Thomas”, Jimmy grabbed his face and pulled him down for a kiss. After that, Thomas slowly made his way down Jimmy’s neck, more likely than not marking him, which made Jimmy even harder, then down his chest, and stomach, and navel- he stopped there. Thomas’ fingers stilled there, then his hands found their way to Jimmy’s sides, trailing invisible circles on his skin to soothe him. Jimmy hadn’t realized he was shaking a bit.

 

“It is going to be alright, Jimmy”, he kissed at his navel and looked in his eyes the whole time, “I’m going to touch you, is that okay?”, he waited for confirmation.

 

“Y-yes, I know, I trust you, I want you to, I’m just a little nervous, that’s all”, Jimmy shakily laughed and then gripped the bed sheets. Thomas made his way to his penis, finally, and took it off his underwear. He kissed its tip, then he trailed his hand along its length, first slowly, then faster, making sure Jimmy liked it as he looked intently in his eyes, but there was no need, Jimmy felt great.

 

“Take me in your mouth, Thomas, please-“, Jimmy moaned loudly, and he didn’t know where all that confidence came from, but it didn’t matter anymore, he wanted Thomas to wrap that pretty mouth of his around his cock and he couldn’t be modest about it if he tried.

 

“Mm, talking dirty, I like it”, Thomas smirked, but took him in his mouth nonetheless, the warm and nice feeling sending him in heaven. Thomas was sucking his dick, going up and down, and the man was driving Jimmy crazy, arching his whole body to meet the heat of Thomas’ heavenly pink mouth.

  
“Yes, yes, oh _god_ , Thomas, mm, like that”, he was a squirming and writhing mess under Thomas. When he licked the tip one last time, Jimmy exploded on his own stomach with a force he never had experienced before. He was seeing stars. He was somewhere else, but not on Earth, he was feeling so, so wonderful. And so spent. When Thomas climbed and started kissing him, he was starting to come back. He kissed him back, slowly and sloppily, panting a bit, finally feeling like Thomas had claimed him as his, finally feeling like they had been really together.

  
Then he remembered, Thomas must need a release too, so he untangled his fingers that somehow had found their way into Thomas’ hair and touched his penis. A few strokes and he was already there, laying beside Jimmy on the too small to be comfortable bed, both of them panting and feeling pretty tired.

 

“Was it any good?”, Thomas asked, a teasing touch to his question.

 

“It was the best, Thomas, I swear to you”, Jimmy smiled contently from ear to ear, not caring anymore about being inexperienced and all that. It really was great.

 

“You did so good, love”, Thomas pushed himself on one elbow and kissed the boy tenderly.

 

“So, I get it you still love me, then?”, Jimmy teased, trailing invisible figures on Thomas’ chest.

 

“Most definitely”, Thomas said as Jimmy rested his head on his chest, Thomas’ hands caressing his hair soothingly and making him sleepy.

 

“What if I-“, Jimmy yawned “-I fell asleep here?”, he hugged Thomas’ torso while Thomas pulled the blanket over their naked bodies and hugged him back.

 

“Then we’ll have to think in the morning how to get you out of here without anyone noticing. But we would eventually be fine”, Thomas murmured against the blonde’s hair.

 

“Mmh”, Jimmy said against Thomas’ chest, and he fell asleep pretty fast with Thomas’ fingers in his hair and around his body.

 

Thomas sighed contently, wondering how he deserved to hold Jimmy in his arms and being just happy to be the reason for Jimmy’s calm smile in his sleep.

 

He was just going to make sure he showed Jimmy how much he loved him more often, Thomas thought as he nuzzled Jimmy’s hair and fell asleep happy.

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Leave a review if ya like!


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